So it begins! I’m experimenting with third person voices this year, using “rained out picnic” as a prompt.
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In those days, men were corrupt, and rejoiced in their wickedness and reveled in violence. And as they were carousing in the field, there was a loud noise, and the sky grew dark. They were frightened, for they had never heard or seen such things. But some said that the gods were angry, and they began to search among them for a sacrifice. They seized a woman. But she took her knife and thrust it into the side of one of those who was trying to bind her. And the skies opened and water poured down.
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What type of story does this feel like to you? When does it take place? Tell me in the comments!
Check out the Voice Week homepage for links to everyone’s voices.
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Interesting story, beKind. It feels almost biblical in tone, although I’m not sure the Bible would have “the gods” unless this was a section about some heathens. Can’t wait to see how else this story comes out over the next few days…
Biblical was exactly what I was going for! Thank you!
this sounds Celtic, definitely some sort of pagan group. Rough, uncivilized to modern standards.
My Voice week piece will be posted later tonight.
Pagan, rough, uncivilized, yes; also what I was aiming for.
I look forward to reading yours!
This is a revenge story. I like to think that the woman is a goddess, walking to the earth to taste the sin of man. Sevenfold punishment to ensue. The ancient pagan feel of the piece is very strong. however, to turn it on its head a little I like to think of this as a story being told far in the future, looking back to their interpretation of society today.
Very interesting take. She’s not a goddess, but you’re right on with the sin of man and punishment to ensue. As to the future – well, that’s coming.
The destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah came to mind as I read this. Biblical almost, as if from that time period (old testament) .
Do we leave a link to our attempt somewhere?
Nope, I go around to all the Voice Writer blogs and gather links to the pieces. I just linked Discovery a moment ago!
Excellent! Very close. Biblical, yes. A little earlier than Sodom and Gomorrah, though. : )
Definite tones of primitive. These people are still in awe of the unknown, times are hard, only the fittest survive – sounds like this girl is a survivor.
Right on!
Reminded me of Gotham city! But Of course this is way before the times of Bruce Wayne!
Back when Gods had direct access to worldly matters…
Interesting!
Gotham City is a fitting analogy, actually. Glad you liked it!
The voice, as others have noticed, has a Biblical or codex flare to it. The question of whether or not anything supernatural is happening is wide open (it could be entirely mundane, or not) which I like. I had the inkling of an impression that it was taking place in the far-distant future, but it could also be a Great Flood myth.
You hit it! Great Flood. I figured if I was going to write about five rained-out picnics, I might as well start with the very first one! I was going to mention the heathen’s resentment of the crazy old man building the giant gopher wood box, but I decided that would be too obvious. : )
Thanks for reading.
Go me! Do I get a cookie?
Well, the only kind of cyber cookie is a tracking cookie, and those are no fun. So I’ll give you a million awesome points! (I have been asked if there is a way to redeem said awesome points. I still don’t know the answer.)
I will give you the answer. It is “yes” and I can redeem them by giving you a writing challenge and then getting to enjoy the result. After Voice Week is over, of course. 😉
Oh, I see how it is. : ) Should I be frightened? I’m a little frightened.
*strokes a sinister-looking gray cat* frightened of me? Why?
Oh, you try to sound so innocent! But I can smell the truth. I hear the gears turning in your brain.
Sounds like I need brain grease… which sounds revolting.
Brain grease – yes! Someone needs to package and sell that! The new snake oil – think faster, remember everything, read whole books in seconds, find the cure to cancer…
This is awesome! I absolutely love the style this was written in, and the perspective.
I’d say it centers around an *old* civilization, based on their actions and beliefs.
=)
Yes! I’m so glad you liked it!
A great start to your Voice Week.
This had a very biblical feel to it, I loved the first line, “In those days, men were corrupt, and rejoiced in their wickedness and reveled in violence.” You almost know that someone or something, somewhere, wants to sort this lot out.
Can’t wait for the next voice.
Even without the cure for cancer that would be enough to get me to buy it!
Are you ready for your challenge?
*Takes a deep breath* As ready as I’ll ever be. ; P
Bring it on!
Alright, then. I would like you to write the Mysterious Affair of the Marshmallow Mushroom Forest. Everything else is up to you, and of course, take your time. 🙂
Now, this IS a challenge. I accept! It shall be done! Hopefully next week…?
Don’t stress over it if you are busy. I’m patient. 😉
I won’t stress. : ) But NOT doing it this week would mean I’d have to come up with something else for a blog post, haha.
I really liked your take on this challenge. Each voice was so completely different (and also very good), It felt inter dimensional. You win, I think/
Woohoo! I’m glad you liked it so much. I was quite impressed with everyone’s work. : )
I hope that is not maniacal laughter. Though, if you have cracked from the strain, the results should at least be of use in tracing your decent into madness. 😉
We’re all mad here. : )
🙂