Third voice for the prompt “rained out picnic.”
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Despite many earnest supplications sent heavenward, the weather banished any hope of their having the picnic. Dingy clouds ruffled the sky upon the bleak sunrise, bellowing grumbles tickled the hills at mid-morning and by noon the whole countryside was dowsed in water and broken hearts. Consequently, large drops fell inside the house as well as out. She sat at the window sniffling, feeling rather betrayed. For though the Lord had promised Noah He would never again destroy the whole earth with rain, her world seemed wholly ruined.
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What type of story does this feel like to you? When does it take place? Tell me in the comments!
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Late Victorian novel or novella? Possibly a short-story.
Close. I was aiming for Jane Austen-type voice, so…Georgian?
A bit of a Victorian, country village feel. Still have religion as a linking element beyond the rain.
A little older than that, but not by much! You’re rigth on with the religious element.
I love the imagery of the “dingy clouds”. Sorrow and misery is clear, but I’m getting a sense of an adolescent girl — someone who could view a spoilt picnic as being unanimous with a “wholly ruined” world.
Yes! Definitely young. This one sort of outlines how we often pray for trivial things and then overreact when we don’t get the answer we want.
I’m not sure of time. Everyone is suggesting Victorian, but I’m not so sure about that. I still feel the spiritual/religious ties in the story and how every character is heartbroken in someway.
I had just finished rereading Pride & Prejudice when I wrote it, so I was going for that time period – just before Victorian.
I’m going with gothic literature – you’ve got enough pathetic fallacy here to fill a Bronte novel, and there’s heart-break thrown in too. Must be Emily!
Hmmm. I was going for Austen, rather than Bronte – but they are rather similar, so the Bronte comparison makes me feel successful. : ) I haven’t actually read Emily, only Charlotte, but Wuthering Heights is on my to-read list!
Romantic enough for Austen, definitely, but I sensed some of the bleakness of the Brontes. Either way, as you say, they are similar so I think you’ve hit the mark again!
Yes – thank you!!
I get the image of this voice being a child, a young girl. Still that religious theme running through with the mention of Noah. Also the house/building she’s i is old, not in good repair (water coming in) – maybe an old convent?
Intriguing.
Actually, the drops falling inside were referring to her tears. I was trying to be poetic, and was thus perhaps too vague. : / But I’m glad you liked it!
The way you set the scene up in the beginning is wonderful. I’m a huge fan of bleak, rainy days, though, and it’s interesting to see how it can ruin so many lives, if only for a moment. I also love the religious tone carried through these chilling, beautifully written pieces.
=)
Thank you! I’m partial to rainy days myself – sometimes. : )
Oh poor thing! This was poetic!
Thanks! And thanks for reading!