Second voice for the prompt “rained out picnic.”
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She wist not what howling winds and dank rains
The heavens might let fall that merry day,
So kneeling her down before the window,
Begged Saint Medard sunshine for the morrow.
But when the morrow did come and the birds
With their joyful singing should have waked her,
She woke instead to drumming from the skies
On the roof, and then on sleeve from her eyes.
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What type of story does this feel like to you? When does it take place? Tell me in the comments!
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It’s Medieval…I see stone cathedrals and small thatched cottages. Dirt roads, homespun clothing…
Church and God is everything
Yes! Right on.
Medieval, I see a castle of grey Portland stone on a hilltop. It overlooks a grassy area laid out for a fair, maybe to thank St Medard … maybe to appease her
Yes to the first part! St. Medard is the patron saint against bad weather, actually (I had to look that one up).
Victorian, I would guess, or a little earlier. It feels like something from a Victorian book of verse, to me. It stands on that brink between the Old World and the Modern Age, able to topple one way or the other in an instant. It also strikes me as playful.
A little earlier. I took my inspiration from Chaucer for this one, so…14th century?
Ah well, it was worth a guess. It does not summon the medieval vibe for me, but it seems to do so for others!
Well, maybe it needs some more work then. I certainly don’t have much experience writing in medieval style, let alone rhyme. I read a page of Canterbury Tales before writing it, but also drew from Howard Pyle’s King Arthur (which was actually written IN the Victorian era – so don’t start mistrusting your literary sixth sense just yet!
Ah! That is something of a relief. I think the word “window” and “roof” are part of what throws me. “Window” in particular. Leave it to me to throw off your rhyme.
They had windows back then! Did they call them something else, maybe?
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A real mix of joy and sorrow in this poem-like piece! and definitely a very different one from your first voice. I’m wondering if my voices are sufficiently different from each other now or if I interpreted the challenge all wrong!
Not at all! It all depends on context. Subtly different voices are just as good, or even better than, vastly different voices. My pieces this year cover the same situation but in several different time periods. Since yours are from different characters’ perspectives in the same time period, the voices will naturally be more similar to each other. The shift in perspective in your pieces so far is fascinating. Keep it up!
The medieval would have been what I guessed as well. Is it irony that she prayed for no rain and it rained anyway since she’s the patron saint against bad weather? It’s funny at least. It almost read like a bard should be singing this.
Well, she’s not St. Medard – she was only praying to St. Medard – but yes, there is some irony there, I suppose. The weather does not bow to our whims.
Argh, I can see now how the wording would indicate SHE was St. Medard. Curse the mysterious sentence structures of yesteryear! I shall have to find a way to fix it without destroying my 10-syllable per line record.
My eyes must have skimmed over that part. My bad. Poor girl though, she seems to be having a rough day besides.
I may or may not love this more than the first. I like how it’s written in verse rather than prose, and irony tops it right off. I’m excited to read someone else’s POV. Personally, I love the rain.
(Also, sorry I missed a day! I already put up the entry, but I don’t know if it’ll show up correctly. Technially, I posted it an hour ago, but the date reads the 2nd. Which is kind of cheating, but whatever.)
=)
But you likely only love it when you are planning a day in, to write and read and drink copious amounts of tea. Not when you are planning a day of outdoor merriment and gaiety, as this lady was. : )
Glad you enjoyed it!
A lot mellower than the first one… “on the sleeve of her eyes” is beautiful!
An interesting second voice.
I like the way you moved from prose to poetry – intriguing.
Like others I get a definite medieval feel to this, yet at the same time I notice that both pieces finish with something dark, evil, menacing seemingly coming from the skies? Somehow I don’t see it as just rain …… but then again I’ve got a strange mind!
Looking forward to Day 3.
They had windows, and sometimes called them windows, but there were very few, and it’s such a generic term that it doesn’t tell me where to picture her. When I hear “window” a medieval structure isn’t the first I think of.
Ah, yes. Fair enough, true enough. This one needs work anyway… : )